Because we have different views

Sitting here questioning everything because you don't want to talk about dreams with me. You don't want to talk about a future. Because you don't know if I'm worth it anymore. But you don't wanna tell me that. Because at the same time you want me too. But you don't want me like this... But you don't want me like that.. You want me to be someone I'm not. But I'm not. And I won't allow you to talk like that to me.

I told you in the night about my fright 

About my fear of never coming back

Once you enter my mind 

A place of home and warmth

And deathly despair

 It's difficult to get back from there 

I don't remember how I did it last time

You and I

You and I forever 

You and I at last

You and I equal together

You and I were the past

Pretend

Could ask for your love forever

Could pretend it's real

Maybe it is 

But it doesn't feel it

I can't talk to you

Without wanting to cry

But I love you

Can you.. 

Tell me why

Here standing in the rain

Tell me again I'm insane

Let the whispers sink in

Let me get under your skin

The struggle will be real

Something we're both to feel

You were never just nobody to me

Star

Self worth

Because I don't wanna let you know I'm struggling

I don't wanna tell you that I'm hurt

I wanna pick myslef up

Prove to myself my worth

Sitting here pondering what it is I'm even here for. I feel chained. Trying to stay awake stay alive for as long as I can. Just wanna make it to my happily ever after

Good vs evil

Because you can't have one without the other 

Where there is good there is bad

He was her demon assigned by Satan himself to turn her to the darkside to show her the depths of her shadows. To teach her the love and bliss of pain. He was tall and handsome with deep soul piercing eyes. Being assigned to the women he saw her dark complexion and the curves of her body, when she looked at him he could hear her inner demon whispering to him. Beckoning him to come closer and to set her free.

She was his angel assigned by God himself to show him the way to the light. To show him compassion, promise, and understanding. Being assigned to the man she saw his spirit and the strength of his heart, when she looked at him she could see his longingness for something she wasn't sure what but he called to her to hold him.

In stories as he sets to turn her and she learns of her gift to save him 

A missing connection

Reality. Dreams. Love. Hope. Passion. Understanding. 

There's a man there, holding out his hand to a women. The woman walking towards the man takes his hand and starts to walk with him along the side walk. Making their way to a park near by they stop and have a seat on a bench. There the man start to talk to the women. She listens to him talk, listens to his voice. Watched his lips move as he spoke. After he had said just about all he needed to say the woman decided she didn't want him to stop talking. She wanted to hear more about his minds and she too wanted to share her mind with him. She opens her mouth and starts to ask questions to the man, but he becomes slightly closed off. No longer really wanting to talk anymore. He shushes her lips and pulls her in close saying, "Just live in the moment."

She was. She was already living the moment. But she wanted insight on the future. She tries not to get too disappointed with the response of the man, possibly he just needs a bit to think on his answer. 

Some time later the girl decided once again to ask. The man this time answers the woman, but his response held nothing in it to keep the attention of the woman. No longer did she want to hear him talk she didn't want to hear his voice. No longer did she want to watch his lips move as he spoke. She didn't just want to live in the present she wanted to think on the future. She wanted to push her mind to its greatest and to have the man there with her. Perhaps though she was meant to keep walking past the park and only he was meant to stay.

How would you interpret this dream?

I told you about my dreams and you instead of using them to build with me you use them to build against me. It hurts. It's painful to know that all that matters is your dreams. But I don't want to stand stuck like you. I want to move forward.

Cvgghvchkm n.

Tonight the words crept into my mind and caused the tears to come full speed from my eyes and my body started to tremble . So frustrated.... Once I learn to meditate will I ever wake up?

When it's all done and over

You get to walk away

Then after you leave

There'll still be nothing to say

Can't tell if you're messing with me

Just playing with these feelings

Or if there's any hope here

You're confusing me

Everything you say

Is hard to hear

Because I'm not sure who they're meant for...

One step

At a time

Remembering

I'm yours 

Your mine

Nothing could ever

Remove you

From my heart 

Come hold me closer love

Don't wanna be apart

My fault?

Woke up feeling sick 

All I can think is you did this to me

But I can't blame you

I don't want to hate you

Just want it all to go away

Once I chose you 

Hoped your love was true

But what is love

Have I done it wrong

Is this really my fault

Why do I long for the abuse

Why do I become scared to leave

Why do I start to cry and worry 

I know you care about me but you can't love me like you can love her

You've never been able to 

And I could never for you

You don't treat me like a queen

How can I call you my king

You've ripped my heart out 

Placed it in your pocket

Perhaps you hope 

You'll bend me to be her

Though I long for you

Thoughts of you give me a headache

Reading words you write to me

Anger and sadness cause me to be sick

How could I have let it come to this

So confused now, I'm not in your head

That girl you first knew, feels dead

Hibernation perhaps, motivation lacks

To love and be loved

Could spend my days waiting on you like I waited on him but I'm tired of sin I want something true now he's here for me and I want to believe but I worry. What if it's really my fault to begin with, I'm not sinless. I just hope to give my all

Star

Scared

Scared. Scared to fall in love again. 

My emotions are already such a mess

But to have you hold me would be heaven

To have you next to me would be beyond the greatest

But it's not having you near that scared me

It's knowing that you'll have to leave

He's waiting

He's there, I know he's there, he's laying in bed waiting for me
He's hoping, hoping, that my thoughts aren't trrue
He's off in his mind dreaming of a life we both want
He's drowning away the thought of me with every smoke
He's down to the bottom of every bottle
He's thinking maybe he can do it differently, I guess we'll see
He's thinking now, I hear his thoughts grow louder
He's wishing now, to have me just a little longer
He's lucky though that he makes my heart sputter
He's special, now I hope he knows